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Funny
Fairy Tales by Ambrose Bierce
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The Patriot and the Banker
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A PATRIOT who had taken office poor and retired rich was introduced
at a bank where he desired to open an account.
'With pleasure,' said the Honest Banker; 'we shall be glad to do
business with you; but first you must make yourself an honest man
by restoring what you stole from the Government.'
'Good heavens!' cried the Patriot; 'if I do that, I shall have
nothing to deposit with you.'
'I don't see that,' the Honest Banker replied. 'We are not the
whole American people.'
'Ah, I understand,' said the Patriot, musing. 'At what sum do you
estimate this bank's proportion of the country's loss by me?'
'About a dollar,' answered the Honest Banker.
And with a proud consciousness of serving his country wisely and
well he charged that sum to the account.
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